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I read once that friendships only last an average of 9 months. That made me a bit sad because I believe and feel like people are becoming increasingly isolated by technology and illnesses. I think friends are the most important thing in one's life because you choose them to be close to. You go to them to have fun, be happy and support you when your relationship goes wrong. For me, my friends mean the world.Family is one support system, but friends are different. I don't always get along with my family as they have their own little quirks and it's difficult for me to relate to them on some things. With a friend you have someone that you can be weird with. Someone that shares the same interest. Not every friend will be someone that you bear your heart and soul to, but they can be there to just have a good time.
To Write Love on Her Arms is having a campaign called People Need People. It's true! We can't all live in a vacuum, completely cut off and alone. Part of depression makes you withdraw from everyone because of the distorted belief that the world is better off without you. One of the things we do in therapy is make a plan to be social at least once a week. Another person can make you forget your troubles for a little bit. It doesn't matter what the social event is, as long as it is with another person, your friend.
When I got depressed my friends shifted a bit. Some grew distant, while some left completely. Others stepped forward because they cared enough to make sure I was ok. I had one friend, Ashley, take time out of her schedule so that we could go to dinner because I was having a bad week. Sue is always there to promote my blog because it matters to me. Friendship is about support and the little things because the little things are what is most important.
Humans were meant to be social creatures. We were not meant to sit at home, watch TV or play on the computer all the time. We were meant to go out, play games, talk over dinner and generally just hang out. We are meant to be together, which is why friends are so important. Some friends you might be super affectionate with, others you may never hug, others you may only see once a year, but they are all important in your life.
Yes, it hurts when friends disappear without giving a reason. If they do give a reason, then they cared enough about you to tell you goodbye. It might be hurting them just as much, but some things are worth getting your heart broken for.
There will be friends that you only go out to eat with, some that you see every once in a while and then there will be friends that will pick you up off the floor. No matter how close they are, they are still your friends and you always need them. With depression being around people is part of what the doctor orders. New friends, old friends, close friends, or distant friends, it doesn't matter. Friends make life better.
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