If I Had A Little Money

Being an adult is so overrated.  I don't know why kids are in such a rush to grow up and go out into the real world.  It's much more fun to have no responsibility and pretend.

I live in Connecticut, which is one of the most expensive states to live in in the US.  We have an influx of New Yorkers because New York is even more expensive because of their property taxes.  Since, CT is so expensive, a lot of people have to work 2 jobs to make ends meet.  I mean I did my budget and I'm $600 short a month, if I had to do everything by myself.  I personally blame my student loans for a huge chunk of the shortage.

I wish either my job paid more or that I had saved a lot.  Either way, I need to get a second job.  I have put myself online at for tutoring and I signed up to be a freelance writer for hub pages.  I am not quite sure what I want to write either.  I'm hoping that I can make enough doing that without having to work in retail again.  I had such a bad experience doing that. 

The good thing is that my friend, Casey seems like he wants to move in when his lease is up in January.  Sharing the place would be cheaper for the both of us.  It might also help alleviate some of the loneliness that we both feel.  Don't start thinking like that.  Nothing is going to happen that area.  No more romance for me.

I have to try to save money, but I have never really been good at it.  I am definitely cutting down on my spending and trying to use up the things that I have.  It's not easy because spending money makes people feel least temporarily.  There is only one thing that I want and it comes out in August.  Maybe I can scrape together the $20 for it.


Well, after the day I had, I will no longer have money for a while.  I got suspended from my job mostly because I can no longer claim retaliation from management for my last discrimination complaint.  I am a liability but this time I will not play games.

Human perception is inherently flawed.  I have not recovered from the depression that they caused since it was almost impossible to not hate what they did.  Apparently they have been investigating me for 2 months and dragged up things that happened 2 years ago.  They also pulled things in from last year when they knew I was severely depressed as well as the year before.

I believe that their actions have been discriminatory.  The fact that I have been ambushed several times and never offered corrective action or anything about the complaints they have put down as to why I am suspended.  I will most likely be terminated and I will take some kind of action.  I would rather be the face of mental illness because I fought it than the people who shoot up schools.  I am so much better than them.

I will survive.  Let them fire me.  They have lost their goodness.  I am hoping to create a place that while disciplinary action can be necessary,  compassion and understanding will matter more.  For all their talk of family, they protect no one.  It is probably the worst company I have ever worked for.

I find it ironic that American culture celebrates individuality, but corporate culture wants people to all be the same and never complain.  If I knew that this was going to happen like this, I would never have strived to do a great job at sales for this company. 

The main reason that I am working on Pile of Good Things is to educate corporations on mental illness, so that they know the difference and the subtleties of different types of mental illness.  The stigma is huge and it is worst at jobs.  If I can change it, I will.

Time to start pounding the pavement again.


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